Sunday, May 03, 2009

Seeing Jesus in the Chaos

Chaos. That's the word I would use to describe the last ten days in my world. The exercises for today could not have been more perfectly suited for where I find myself personally. As much as I enjoy our public worship Gatherings, today was a day I met with God in a personal and very private way. I pray that the experience is equally as powerful to you. 

The Daily Examen is probably a new experience for many of you. In many ways, it is a chance to keep short accounts with God when it comes to the areas of rebellion and sin in our lives. The early Desert Fathers used this practice as a way to end their day. Today I used it to begin my day by reviewing the day just past. Taking the time to replay the day gave me a chance to zoom in on events of the day with an eye for areas in which I could have more accurately reflected Christ in my life. That was the natural way for me to use the examen. After working though those areas, I was able to return to those moments and contemplate where God was speaking to me. The phrase that God brought to my mind was, "Be still and still moving." It's a phrase that I have been returning to that reminds me of my need to lead and be from a quiet center while still actively pursuing God's purpose for my life. I wonder what word or phrase God will give to you.

I love the Jesus Prayer! What a beautiful way to enter into a time of quiet centering prayer before God. It recognizes both my sinfulness and need of God's grace as well as the promise of God to grant us mercy in our time of need. As difficult as it can be to sit in quietness and stillness, the spiritual rewards are amazing! I can't always put my finger on what God has done in me through this time but I know that it is both real and powerful. Lord Jesus christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

The Imaginative Meditation is an intense way to encounter the Scriptures in perhaps a new way. The concept of entering into the narrative to identify with the situation and even a character takes a one dimensional text and makes it come alive in 3D. I chose the account of the Transfiguration of Jesus in Matthew 17 and entered the narrative as Peter (Peter is an easy identification for me since my actions often mimic his). I was seated on the floor of my office with the bright overhead light shining down on me. As I entered the story and the bright light of transfiguration, I lifted my eyes toward the bright light, imagining the brightness that the disciples experienced. Even through my closed eyelids, the brightness of the light was inescapable. When I brought my head back down, I considered all the times in the past week where I have seen Jesus. I've seen him in the prayer of my congregation for my wife and family. I've seen him in the donation of airline miles so my wife could spend extra time with her grieving mother. I've seen him in the plant delivered by my neighbor who herself just suffered incredible loss. I've seen him in the meals lovingly prepared for my family. I might have missed these Jesus appearances if I hadn't stopped to look into the light. 


No comments: